Anatomy of a Party

The Host: This one is pretty obvious. This person is in charge of the inviting and therefore ends up being the one knowing most of the people. He or she is most likely the first one to get to know those who were invited by a friend of a friend. The host is also usually the most stressed (despite what he or she may look like from the outside) because he or she carries the burden of making sure everybody enjoys themselves. But, the host is often the one who enjoys the party the most since the activities are typically his or her favorite.

The Loudmouth: There are a few variants of this attendee. This person has the loudest voice and personality. If you only go to the first hour or so of the party you will not meet this person because he or she shows up either midway through the party or towards the end. There will be others who will try to be like the loudmouth, but the difference is that the true loudmouth will enter loud, be followed or observed by the majority of the group and leave loud. The wannabe's will merely have loud moments trying to get attention but won't be as effective. An interesting observation I have made is that typically this person will not be the host (which I don't completely understand).

The Jerk: Sometimes this person is one and the same as the loudmouth, but doesn't have to be. This person will  indeed have a loud mouth but will use it to tear others down in order to build himself up (yup it's usually a guy). Unfortunately, there will be others in the group who will laugh and will follow the jerk, so the jerk will continue to belittle others in order to win more prestige. The saddest thing is that this guy will either come with a girl or will have a group of girls admiring him for most of the party. Why girls give so much attention to the jerk is beyond me and would need a post of its own later.

The Genuine One: This one is the antithesis of the jerk. He or she will use his or her mouth to build-up the members of the group. He or she is unafraid to join a conversation or start one. The host loves this attendee because the host will be able to count on the genuine one to get involved and involve every member of the group. The popularity of this person varies with the personality of the groups because they will have to choose between this person and the jerk.

The Good-looking One: He or she will float around the groups seamlessly because everybody wants to talk to the good-looking one. Because of the good looks, he or she can't to anything wrong and will be admired by most everyone. So, this person has the power to be the jerk or the genuine one. If he knows and takes pride in the fact that he is the good-looking one, he will typically chose the role of the jerk. But, if these roles are already established, the good-looking one will just be the social butterfly that everybody wants to date.

The Socially-awkward One: Otherwise known as the wall flower. This individual is the opposite of the good-looking one. Whereas the good-looking one can't do anything wrong in the minds of the people, this individual can't seem to do anything right. When he or she tries to be the loudmouth, everybody just laughs at the ridiculous and awkward things that come out of that mouth. When trying to be the jerk, this person is then shunned. Trying to be the genuine one typically just causes him or her to be ignored by most everyone.

Lesson learned here: good looks give you popularity and the power to be whatever you choose to be.

If you have additional insights on this, I'm all ears.

Who Do You Think You Are?

I love driving, mostly because I have for years driven my car with the idea that driving should be exciting. Now, there's a big difference between exciting and crazy. Crazy is the same as selfish and stupid while my kind of exciting equals controlled fun. While I'm all about driving exciting, one of the things that ticks me off the most in life is having to deal with people who drive crazy.

We're talking people who drive like they are the only cars on the road. These are people who don't pay attention to what is going on around them. Or how about those who don't know what a signal is supposed to be used for (they make sure to signal right in a right only turn lane but fail to signal before cutting you off).

When I encounter these kinds of drivers I typically yell at them in Icelandic or, on occasion, Italian. Those who make me really upset, I reserve my most vicious curse - something about poop coming upon them and their family.

Something that really irks me is when I'm driving behind a line of cars and the car behind me pulls some lame move to get right in front of me. That's when I yell out "Hver ert þú?" which means "Who are you?" Why do you think that you deserve to cut in front of me gaining you little to no advantage? How much time is this person really saving? I think the research says they average .137 seconds while driving 50 mph. I can't believe they have the audacity to jump in front of the person waiting in line.

After saying something in a different language, what is then my favorite thing to do? Fly past them. Inevitably the person is an idiot and has no real sense of what is going on with the traffic. This makes it really easy for me who loves to find the perfect holes and faster lanes that allow me to drive past these jerks. I get great satisfaction out of asserting my dominance by showing them my tail lights.

Lesson: if you're going to be a jerk on the road, at least have some skill or finesse about it.

Life Lessons from Zelda

Sometimes the only way forward is to go backward.

Talk to everybody you meet. They probably have nothing really important to say but once in a while you find that necessary bit of information you have been searching for.

If you have tried more than 5 times to jump somewhere or blow up something and you can't quite get it, don't fret. Leave it for now and you will get something later that will help you accomplish whatever it is you're doing.

You can't save the girl until you have completed every task.

It was all about her, it was never about you.

You can't defeat Ganondorf on your own. You will need Zelda.

It's much easier when you find and use the map and compass.

Don't waste your time obsessing over mini-games. You really don't need to hold extra arrows, bombs, or whatever. The dungeons will provide what you need.

When in doubt, play a song.

If it causes pain, you can destroy it.

Don't forget to use your shield. You don't always have to be on the offensive.

There may be items like the Giant's Mask that will only be used once. You might think it's stupid to get it in the first place, but that one time you use it will help you get to your eventual goal.

There's always another puzzle.

When stuck, look around you. For the really hard puzzles, there's always going to be a hint somewhere.

Don't forget to look up.

Don't tell yourself, "I'll come back to this later." If you can do it, do it now. Otherwise you may forget, plus backtracking is annoying.

When you're about to give up, ask yourself, "Have I used everything at my disposal?" Sometimes the answer comes using the most random of items.

Taking the time to help others is never a waste.

Don't waste your money by buying items that you can find in pots or in the grass.

Fill your empty bottles. A healing potion doesn't cost that much anyway.

Power is not as great as Courage and Wisdom working together.

You were chosen to be the hero.

Pure happiness this is. Those who know me would understand how I laughed my head off watching this. Thank you Gotye for posting it on your blog.

Perceptions

If first impressions are so important, how can you make sure you are giving off the correct signals so that those around you perceive what you want them to? I wish I had the answer.

I was talking with a friend today about how the majority of people perceive him, and our conversation intrigued me. He said everybody assumes he is in the military. Apparently, he had thought about going into the military partly because people had suggested it as a good fit for his personality. During this conversation, I thought about my first impression of him and indeed I had assumed he had been or was going to be in the military. Another friend mentioned how the other night a group of people in the area were together and a girl who I don't think has had much interactions with this guy made an interesting comment. She said she thought he was the kind of guy who would shoot stuff. This intrigued me because I wondered what it was about him that made people make this false assumption.

Had he talked a lot about guns? I don't think so, besides I don't think she had ever talked to him before. Was he a workout-aholic? Nope. Is he particularly gruff and short in his mannerisms? Ah, maybe we're getting somewhere.

Forgive the stereotyping. I have had a few friends in the military and have seen some commonalities with some of them. That, of course, doesn't mean that these attributes are true of every military man or woman.

I think people perceive him as being angry. He has a very serious look on his face when he talks, if he talks much at all. He isn't afraid to say what's on his mind no matter if it's against social norms or not. His words are short and to the point, and his voice is quite deep and rather monotone. All these factors, I believe contribute to people's false perceptions. The thing is, all these factors could potentially be fixed. He could work on altering the way he talks, giving others the chance to feel safe getting closer to him.

Whether we would like to admit it or not, people generally can read faces. Neuroscience research has found that basic facial expressions are universally known and understood. If basic expressions are understood across the world, then certainly people within our own cultures have a better chance at understanding unspoken messages. There is a part of our brain that tries to understand those around us by helping us put ourselves in their shoes. Of course, some people are better at reading the "micro-expressions" than others, but everybody does this to some extent.

I wondered what my mannerisms tell others about me. Do I look like I have an angry face when I'm relaxed or thinking? Does my tendency to want to listen make others think I don't want to talk to them? Does it look like I'm snobbish because I get nervous and don't know what to say sometimes in social settings and end up leaving quickly?

The answer to all these questions is probably a yes. This is why we need close friends who aren't afraid to tell us how we can work on helping others make the correct perceptions of us. I guess that means I need to be that friend too.

Tree of Life

Last night I watched a very unique film called The Tree of Life. It was quite artsy which was why I liked it. I enjoy artsy films because they tend to communicate powerful messages in unique ways. There was one section especially that I thought was beautiful.

After a mother and father receive news that their son has died, the movie shows various shots and moments of the grieving parents. The acting and cinematography really help you get a taste of what such grieving might feel like.

Then, the powerful scene begins with hearing the mother praying to God asking (paraphrasing) "Why would you let this happen? Aren't you the most powerful, most merciful being?" All you see is this beautiful, colorful nebula swirling in the blackness. When the mother finishes her plea, the music builds as the screen shows a variety of shots in space. The film shows the creation of stars and the movement of planets and galaxies. The shots are particularly dazzling and majestic.

As the music came to its climax, I saw this as God's answer to the mother's anguished cries. To me, the film was trying to show a bit of God's side of the story. It was as if He were saying "I know this hurts. I know you think you know what sounds what's right, but you don't. Do you think that I, as the most powerful and merciful being would turn aside to let something as awful as this happen without having a very important reason? I created the heavens and everything that lives and moves in them. Whereas you could only imagine such magnificent things, I have organized them all. I created them all with all their complexity, beauty and grandeur. My infinite understanding far surpasses your limited sight and knowledge. Don't worry. Grieve now, but know that in the end it will all make sense. When you have learned all that you can learn, you will understand why this had to happen."

Unfortunately this blog post cannot do it justice. You simply have to experience the film for yourself. I recommend it, but only if you can watch an alinear film that without much of a plot and not get bored.

One of My Greatest Moments

I was in a patient's room for a minute when in walks the doctor and nurse. The doctor chats with the patient for a bit and notices a tube going into the patient other than the normal IV.

Doctor: "Is this an epidural? Why does this patient have an epidural?"

Nurse: "I don't think it's an epidural. It's a... uh..."

Me: "It's a femoral block."

Nurse: "Right. Yes, that's what it is."

Come on medical schools. I'm no dummy.