I love driving, mostly because I have for years driven my car with the idea that driving should be exciting. Now, there's a big difference between exciting and crazy. Crazy is the same as selfish and stupid while my kind of exciting equals controlled fun. While I'm all about driving exciting, one of the things that ticks me off the most in life is having to deal with people who drive crazy.
We're talking people who drive like they are the only cars on the road. These are people who don't pay attention to what is going on around them. Or how about those who don't know what a signal is supposed to be used for (they make sure to signal right in a right only turn lane but fail to signal before cutting you off).
When I encounter these kinds of drivers I typically yell at them in Icelandic or, on occasion, Italian. Those who make me really upset, I reserve my most vicious curse - something about poop coming upon them and their family.
Something that really irks me is when I'm driving behind a line of cars and the car behind me pulls some lame move to get right in front of me. That's when I yell out "Hver ert รพรบ?" which means "Who are you?" Why do you think that you deserve to cut in front of me gaining you little to no advantage? How much time is this person really saving? I think the research says they average .137 seconds while driving 50 mph. I can't believe they have the audacity to jump in front of the person waiting in line.
After saying something in a different language, what is then my favorite thing to do? Fly past them. Inevitably the person is an idiot and has no real sense of what is going on with the traffic. This makes it really easy for me who loves to find the perfect holes and faster lanes that allow me to drive past these jerks. I get great satisfaction out of asserting my dominance by showing them my tail lights.
Lesson: if you're going to be a jerk on the road, at least have some skill or finesse about it.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Life Lessons from Zelda
Sometimes the only way forward is to go backward.
Talk to everybody you meet. They probably have nothing really important to say but once in a while you find that necessary bit of information you have been searching for.
If you have tried more than 5 times to jump somewhere or blow up something and you can't quite get it, don't fret. Leave it for now and you will get something later that will help you accomplish whatever it is you're doing.
You can't save the girl until you have completed every task.
It was all about her, it was never about you.
You can't defeat Ganondorf on your own. You will need Zelda.
It's much easier when you find and use the map and compass.
Don't waste your time obsessing over mini-games. You really don't need to hold extra arrows, bombs, or whatever. The dungeons will provide what you need.
When in doubt, play a song.
If it causes pain, you can destroy it.
Don't forget to use your shield. You don't always have to be on the offensive.
There may be items like the Giant's Mask that will only be used once. You might think it's stupid to get it in the first place, but that one time you use it will help you get to your eventual goal.
There's always another puzzle.
When stuck, look around you. For the really hard puzzles, there's always going to be a hint somewhere.
Don't forget to look up.
Don't tell yourself, "I'll come back to this later." If you can do it, do it now. Otherwise you may forget, plus backtracking is annoying.
When you're about to give up, ask yourself, "Have I used everything at my disposal?" Sometimes the answer comes using the most random of items.
Taking the time to help others is never a waste.
Don't waste your money by buying items that you can find in pots or in the grass.
Fill your empty bottles. A healing potion doesn't cost that much anyway.
Power is not as great as Courage and Wisdom working together.
You were chosen to be the hero.
Talk to everybody you meet. They probably have nothing really important to say but once in a while you find that necessary bit of information you have been searching for.
If you have tried more than 5 times to jump somewhere or blow up something and you can't quite get it, don't fret. Leave it for now and you will get something later that will help you accomplish whatever it is you're doing.
You can't save the girl until you have completed every task.
It was all about her, it was never about you.
You can't defeat Ganondorf on your own. You will need Zelda.
It's much easier when you find and use the map and compass.
Don't waste your time obsessing over mini-games. You really don't need to hold extra arrows, bombs, or whatever. The dungeons will provide what you need.
When in doubt, play a song.
If it causes pain, you can destroy it.
Don't forget to use your shield. You don't always have to be on the offensive.
There may be items like the Giant's Mask that will only be used once. You might think it's stupid to get it in the first place, but that one time you use it will help you get to your eventual goal.
There's always another puzzle.
When stuck, look around you. For the really hard puzzles, there's always going to be a hint somewhere.
Don't forget to look up.
Don't tell yourself, "I'll come back to this later." If you can do it, do it now. Otherwise you may forget, plus backtracking is annoying.
When you're about to give up, ask yourself, "Have I used everything at my disposal?" Sometimes the answer comes using the most random of items.
Taking the time to help others is never a waste.
Don't waste your money by buying items that you can find in pots or in the grass.
Fill your empty bottles. A healing potion doesn't cost that much anyway.
Power is not as great as Courage and Wisdom working together.
You were chosen to be the hero.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Perceptions
If first impressions are so important, how can you make sure you are giving off the correct signals so that those around you perceive what you want them to? I wish I had the answer.
I was talking with a friend today about how the majority of people perceive him, and our conversation intrigued me. He said everybody assumes he is in the military. Apparently, he had thought about going into the military partly because people had suggested it as a good fit for his personality. During this conversation, I thought about my first impression of him and indeed I had assumed he had been or was going to be in the military. Another friend mentioned how the other night a group of people in the area were together and a girl who I don't think has had much interactions with this guy made an interesting comment. She said she thought he was the kind of guy who would shoot stuff. This intrigued me because I wondered what it was about him that made people make this false assumption.
Had he talked a lot about guns? I don't think so, besides I don't think she had ever talked to him before. Was he a workout-aholic? Nope. Is he particularly gruff and short in his mannerisms? Ah, maybe we're getting somewhere.
Forgive the stereotyping. I have had a few friends in the military and have seen some commonalities with some of them. That, of course, doesn't mean that these attributes are true of every military man or woman.
I think people perceive him as being angry. He has a very serious look on his face when he talks, if he talks much at all. He isn't afraid to say what's on his mind no matter if it's against social norms or not. His words are short and to the point, and his voice is quite deep and rather monotone. All these factors, I believe contribute to people's false perceptions. The thing is, all these factors could potentially be fixed. He could work on altering the way he talks, giving others the chance to feel safe getting closer to him.
Whether we would like to admit it or not, people generally can read faces. Neuroscience research has found that basic facial expressions are universally known and understood. If basic expressions are understood across the world, then certainly people within our own cultures have a better chance at understanding unspoken messages. There is a part of our brain that tries to understand those around us by helping us put ourselves in their shoes. Of course, some people are better at reading the "micro-expressions" than others, but everybody does this to some extent.
I wondered what my mannerisms tell others about me. Do I look like I have an angry face when I'm relaxed or thinking? Does my tendency to want to listen make others think I don't want to talk to them? Does it look like I'm snobbish because I get nervous and don't know what to say sometimes in social settings and end up leaving quickly?
The answer to all these questions is probably a yes. This is why we need close friends who aren't afraid to tell us how we can work on helping others make the correct perceptions of us. I guess that means I need to be that friend too.
I was talking with a friend today about how the majority of people perceive him, and our conversation intrigued me. He said everybody assumes he is in the military. Apparently, he had thought about going into the military partly because people had suggested it as a good fit for his personality. During this conversation, I thought about my first impression of him and indeed I had assumed he had been or was going to be in the military. Another friend mentioned how the other night a group of people in the area were together and a girl who I don't think has had much interactions with this guy made an interesting comment. She said she thought he was the kind of guy who would shoot stuff. This intrigued me because I wondered what it was about him that made people make this false assumption.
Had he talked a lot about guns? I don't think so, besides I don't think she had ever talked to him before. Was he a workout-aholic? Nope. Is he particularly gruff and short in his mannerisms? Ah, maybe we're getting somewhere.
Forgive the stereotyping. I have had a few friends in the military and have seen some commonalities with some of them. That, of course, doesn't mean that these attributes are true of every military man or woman.
I think people perceive him as being angry. He has a very serious look on his face when he talks, if he talks much at all. He isn't afraid to say what's on his mind no matter if it's against social norms or not. His words are short and to the point, and his voice is quite deep and rather monotone. All these factors, I believe contribute to people's false perceptions. The thing is, all these factors could potentially be fixed. He could work on altering the way he talks, giving others the chance to feel safe getting closer to him.
Whether we would like to admit it or not, people generally can read faces. Neuroscience research has found that basic facial expressions are universally known and understood. If basic expressions are understood across the world, then certainly people within our own cultures have a better chance at understanding unspoken messages. There is a part of our brain that tries to understand those around us by helping us put ourselves in their shoes. Of course, some people are better at reading the "micro-expressions" than others, but everybody does this to some extent.
I wondered what my mannerisms tell others about me. Do I look like I have an angry face when I'm relaxed or thinking? Does my tendency to want to listen make others think I don't want to talk to them? Does it look like I'm snobbish because I get nervous and don't know what to say sometimes in social settings and end up leaving quickly?
The answer to all these questions is probably a yes. This is why we need close friends who aren't afraid to tell us how we can work on helping others make the correct perceptions of us. I guess that means I need to be that friend too.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Tree of Life
Last night I watched a very unique film called The Tree of Life. It was quite artsy which was why I liked it. I enjoy artsy films because they tend to communicate powerful messages in unique ways. There was one section especially that I thought was beautiful.
After a mother and father receive news that their son has died, the movie shows various shots and moments of the grieving parents. The acting and cinematography really help you get a taste of what such grieving might feel like.
Then, the powerful scene begins with hearing the mother praying to God asking (paraphrasing) "Why would you let this happen? Aren't you the most powerful, most merciful being?" All you see is this beautiful, colorful nebula swirling in the blackness. When the mother finishes her plea, the music builds as the screen shows a variety of shots in space. The film shows the creation of stars and the movement of planets and galaxies. The shots are particularly dazzling and majestic.
As the music came to its climax, I saw this as God's answer to the mother's anguished cries. To me, the film was trying to show a bit of God's side of the story. It was as if He were saying "I know this hurts. I know you think you know what sounds what's right, but you don't. Do you think that I, as the most powerful and merciful being would turn aside to let something as awful as this happen without having a very important reason? I created the heavens and everything that lives and moves in them. Whereas you could only imagine such magnificent things, I have organized them all. I created them all with all their complexity, beauty and grandeur. My infinite understanding far surpasses your limited sight and knowledge. Don't worry. Grieve now, but know that in the end it will all make sense. When you have learned all that you can learn, you will understand why this had to happen."
Unfortunately this blog post cannot do it justice. You simply have to experience the film for yourself. I recommend it, but only if you can watch an alinear film that without much of a plot and not get bored.
After a mother and father receive news that their son has died, the movie shows various shots and moments of the grieving parents. The acting and cinematography really help you get a taste of what such grieving might feel like.
Then, the powerful scene begins with hearing the mother praying to God asking (paraphrasing) "Why would you let this happen? Aren't you the most powerful, most merciful being?" All you see is this beautiful, colorful nebula swirling in the blackness. When the mother finishes her plea, the music builds as the screen shows a variety of shots in space. The film shows the creation of stars and the movement of planets and galaxies. The shots are particularly dazzling and majestic.
As the music came to its climax, I saw this as God's answer to the mother's anguished cries. To me, the film was trying to show a bit of God's side of the story. It was as if He were saying "I know this hurts. I know you think you know what sounds what's right, but you don't. Do you think that I, as the most powerful and merciful being would turn aside to let something as awful as this happen without having a very important reason? I created the heavens and everything that lives and moves in them. Whereas you could only imagine such magnificent things, I have organized them all. I created them all with all their complexity, beauty and grandeur. My infinite understanding far surpasses your limited sight and knowledge. Don't worry. Grieve now, but know that in the end it will all make sense. When you have learned all that you can learn, you will understand why this had to happen."
Unfortunately this blog post cannot do it justice. You simply have to experience the film for yourself. I recommend it, but only if you can watch an alinear film that without much of a plot and not get bored.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
One of My Greatest Moments
I was in a patient's room for a minute when in walks the doctor and nurse. The doctor chats with the patient for a bit and notices a tube going into the patient other than the normal IV.
Doctor: "Is this an epidural? Why does this patient have an epidural?"
Nurse: "I don't think it's an epidural. It's a... uh..."
Me: "It's a femoral block."
Nurse: "Right. Yes, that's what it is."
Come on medical schools. I'm no dummy.
Doctor: "Is this an epidural? Why does this patient have an epidural?"
Nurse: "I don't think it's an epidural. It's a... uh..."
Me: "It's a femoral block."
Nurse: "Right. Yes, that's what it is."
Come on medical schools. I'm no dummy.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
The Flirt
Flirt... I don't even like that word. In fact, I have called it the five-letter f-word. Why do we need it and why do we do it? That's a question I have tried to answer for some time and don't think I'll be able to understand it as much as I would like. I have wondered about how this all got started and when. When did our ancestors decide that it was acceptable to act like a complete idiot in order to win someone's affections?
Here's what I think. Dating is difficult. When emotions are involved, confusion easily takes over. What did she mean when she said that? What was the message behind that body movement? Let's face it, we try to read too much into things and tend to get confused. Flirting is a form of communication. It's a method of behavior and speech that hints that you are interested. It makes it easier for the other party to know where you stand and what your intentions are.
Why flirting works on guys? Guys like to be the ones in charge or at least feel like they are. Since a lot about flirting has to deal with vulnerability, guys get hooked by it because that way they feel like they are the ones in control of the relationship. That isn't to say that guys don't flirt because they do. I would imagine it works similarly on girls but I'm not a girl so I can't go there.
Now, there are a few kinds of people that gets labeled as "flirts".
Of course there is the easily recognizable flirt that acts ridiculous because he or she lacks the self-confidence. These are the kinds of people that don't really know who they are and how they fit in socially. They care about what others think about them and therefore do what they can to get people to like them. Conveniently, flirting is a pretty sure-fire, easy way to get people to like you (as long as you don't go overboard).
So are there flirts that do have self-confidence? Of course. One of those is the person who acts like a flirt because he or she really wants to get married. Since flirting is an effective way to get dates, these people use it to go on as many dates as possible. This person doesn't necessarily need the attention and isn't looking for friends. This person views it as a tool.
The final flirt that I can think of is that person who can't help but be seen as a flirt by others. It is in his or her very nature. I'm talking about someone who lacks a personal bubble and doesn't see the bubbles around others. Physical touch is often seen as a flirt. I'm talking about the individual who is really friendly to everyone and personable with everyone. Even someone who gives out compliments every third sentence can be seen as a flirt. I feel bad for these poor people who get all kinds of attention by those they really don't want attention from. Often they can't help that their personality makes them seem flirtatious. These people know who they are and aren't necessarily looking for a relationship.
There you have it, my thoughts on that five-letter word. Silly yet effective. Necessary? I'm still trying to figure that one out.
Here's what I think. Dating is difficult. When emotions are involved, confusion easily takes over. What did she mean when she said that? What was the message behind that body movement? Let's face it, we try to read too much into things and tend to get confused. Flirting is a form of communication. It's a method of behavior and speech that hints that you are interested. It makes it easier for the other party to know where you stand and what your intentions are.
Why flirting works on guys? Guys like to be the ones in charge or at least feel like they are. Since a lot about flirting has to deal with vulnerability, guys get hooked by it because that way they feel like they are the ones in control of the relationship. That isn't to say that guys don't flirt because they do. I would imagine it works similarly on girls but I'm not a girl so I can't go there.
Now, there are a few kinds of people that gets labeled as "flirts".
Of course there is the easily recognizable flirt that acts ridiculous because he or she lacks the self-confidence. These are the kinds of people that don't really know who they are and how they fit in socially. They care about what others think about them and therefore do what they can to get people to like them. Conveniently, flirting is a pretty sure-fire, easy way to get people to like you (as long as you don't go overboard).
So are there flirts that do have self-confidence? Of course. One of those is the person who acts like a flirt because he or she really wants to get married. Since flirting is an effective way to get dates, these people use it to go on as many dates as possible. This person doesn't necessarily need the attention and isn't looking for friends. This person views it as a tool.
The final flirt that I can think of is that person who can't help but be seen as a flirt by others. It is in his or her very nature. I'm talking about someone who lacks a personal bubble and doesn't see the bubbles around others. Physical touch is often seen as a flirt. I'm talking about the individual who is really friendly to everyone and personable with everyone. Even someone who gives out compliments every third sentence can be seen as a flirt. I feel bad for these poor people who get all kinds of attention by those they really don't want attention from. Often they can't help that their personality makes them seem flirtatious. These people know who they are and aren't necessarily looking for a relationship.
There you have it, my thoughts on that five-letter word. Silly yet effective. Necessary? I'm still trying to figure that one out.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Creeper vs. Adorable
Guy sees girl. Guy says to self, "Self, there's something special about her." Guy follows girl out the door and asks for girl's number.
The girl can have one of maybe three reactions. Either she thinks (in a voice that steadily rises in pitch), "Awwwww..." or she says to herself, "OOOOOOOkayyyyyyy...this guy is creepin' me out." The third possibility I'm going to consider irrelevant because it is reserved for those who have chosen the Amazon attitude spoken of in a previous post. It goes something like this: "I don't care who you are, I'm not interested even if you supposedly were mister perfect."
Think about it in these terms. Aragorn - yes, of the Viggo Mortensen variety - plays the part of the guy and, after following the girl, says something like this, "I saw you from across the room and I knew I wanted to talk to you." Cheesy on paper, but I know a good number of girls who would swoon if this were to happen to them. Then imagine the exact same scenario only this time the guy's part is played by your local nerd (you can think of at least one poor soul). Let's say they both use the exact same line saying it in pretty much the exact same way, so the only possible difference in delivery is a difference in pitch. You can see that the nerdy guy will be viewed as a creeper while Aragorn is adorable.
What causes the different reactions? It's a tough one to nail down, but one thing I've noticed that it's not really based on the guy's approach. It matters almost solely on whether the girl could be interested or not. In the case of the Aragorn scenario, the girl would kill to have him approach her, so of course she will think it flattering and adorable. Then there is the nerd who has no greater desire than to find an awesome girl to date but gets rejected and viewed as a creeper just because he doesn't have the looks accompanied with the delivery.
I think we should have more pity for that poor "creeper". Granted there are some real creepers out there and girls need to be wary. The thing is that often some of those real creepers are the guys that get the "Oh, he's so adorable reaction." Why? Because they have the face while their intentions and motives are not pure or good.
Here's what I think girls need to consider. Instead of labeling everyone you're not attracted to who approaches you boldly as a creeper, think of them instead as courageous. It takes a lot of guts to do what that guy did and girls need to find prospects who have real guts. All too often I see wimps at the hospital who get upset at everyone around them, including their wives, when they are in pain. Though these wives are happy, I can't but help thinking that they deserve better. If you aren't attracted to the man who shows courage, that's okay. Just don't automatically label him a creeper.
The thing brave guys need to consider is that "courage alone will not save you". Guys get labeled as creepers because they don't know when to give up. When you make a solid effort and the girl is nice enough to give you the time of day, the battle is not won yet. There are plenty of guys who need to learn when it is time to quit. Surrendering can be very honorable if done timely and in the right way.
I think we should have more pity for that poor "creeper". Granted there are some real creepers out there and girls need to be wary. The thing is that often some of those real creepers are the guys that get the "Oh, he's so adorable reaction." Why? Because they have the face while their intentions and motives are not pure or good.
Here's what I think girls need to consider. Instead of labeling everyone you're not attracted to who approaches you boldly as a creeper, think of them instead as courageous. It takes a lot of guts to do what that guy did and girls need to find prospects who have real guts. All too often I see wimps at the hospital who get upset at everyone around them, including their wives, when they are in pain. Though these wives are happy, I can't but help thinking that they deserve better. If you aren't attracted to the man who shows courage, that's okay. Just don't automatically label him a creeper.
The thing brave guys need to consider is that "courage alone will not save you". Guys get labeled as creepers because they don't know when to give up. When you make a solid effort and the girl is nice enough to give you the time of day, the battle is not won yet. There are plenty of guys who need to learn when it is time to quit. Surrendering can be very honorable if done timely and in the right way.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
The Quest
Men need direction. There must be something tangible lurking in the future that they can work towards, otherwise they wander and end up accomplishing little. I suppose that's why God said in the Old Testament "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make an help meet for him." (Genesis 2:18). They need someone or something to give them purpose and one could look at the "help meet" as a goal or quest as well as a person.
Mythology and legends are full of stories of men who are driven by some quest. Most of the time, that quest is thrust upon them, created and given by some outside source. That source can either be a person (a prophet or oracle) or fate itself. The hero hardly ever chooses his quest probably because the man wouldn't know what to choose if it were left up to him.
Women in mythology tend to not need a quest. Sometimes they are goddesses who decide their own goals and destiny. Sometimes they are women like Odysseus's wife who are left with a choice - do I find another husband or do I wait? In her case, she planned out a test that would offer her the best solution. Sometimes they are like the Amazons who choose to be independent warriors, bound by nothing and no one.
Heroes of legend have a task or a number of tasks given them that they must accomplish in order to achieve some kind of status. Often that status is that of being a husband and father as they often must save the maiden in distress. They cannot achieve this without first undergoing the preparatory process that is their quest. For one reason or another, women did not typically have rights of passage as the men did.
Just as the hero needed to fulfill a quest to save the princess, men today tend to stay aloof of relational commitment because they have not become "men" yet. Women get upset at men for this. They get frustrated because they for the most part are prepared for that kind of relationship. I believe women are typically blessed with the ability to form lasting relationships without having to undergo a process of refining similar to the men. Though I know many women who undergo trials and have careers and other pursuits, I believe they don't necessarily need these in order to be ready for marriage. They are like the Amazons who want to live an independent life or they are simply waiting for their knight to find his own golden fleece.
So, the men need to buck up and get going on their quest and women need to wait for their properly prepared heroes to find them.
What makes this difficult is that sometimes the quest is put on hold for one reason or another, or there remains a heretofore undiscovered quest. This could be why relationships are such a game.
Mythology and legends are full of stories of men who are driven by some quest. Most of the time, that quest is thrust upon them, created and given by some outside source. That source can either be a person (a prophet or oracle) or fate itself. The hero hardly ever chooses his quest probably because the man wouldn't know what to choose if it were left up to him.
Women in mythology tend to not need a quest. Sometimes they are goddesses who decide their own goals and destiny. Sometimes they are women like Odysseus's wife who are left with a choice - do I find another husband or do I wait? In her case, she planned out a test that would offer her the best solution. Sometimes they are like the Amazons who choose to be independent warriors, bound by nothing and no one.
Heroes of legend have a task or a number of tasks given them that they must accomplish in order to achieve some kind of status. Often that status is that of being a husband and father as they often must save the maiden in distress. They cannot achieve this without first undergoing the preparatory process that is their quest. For one reason or another, women did not typically have rights of passage as the men did.
Just as the hero needed to fulfill a quest to save the princess, men today tend to stay aloof of relational commitment because they have not become "men" yet. Women get upset at men for this. They get frustrated because they for the most part are prepared for that kind of relationship. I believe women are typically blessed with the ability to form lasting relationships without having to undergo a process of refining similar to the men. Though I know many women who undergo trials and have careers and other pursuits, I believe they don't necessarily need these in order to be ready for marriage. They are like the Amazons who want to live an independent life or they are simply waiting for their knight to find his own golden fleece.
So, the men need to buck up and get going on their quest and women need to wait for their properly prepared heroes to find them.
What makes this difficult is that sometimes the quest is put on hold for one reason or another, or there remains a heretofore undiscovered quest. This could be why relationships are such a game.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
It feels good to be validated
Walking on BYU campus today I counted 3 people sporting Superman shirts. Batman shirts? None. Chalk one more up for the Man of Steel.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Zelda and James Bond
If you've ever taken a look at the bottom of my blog, you will have noticed a couple pictures of things I'm obsessed about. You may have been wondering "If you're so obsessed, why have you never mentioned it anywhere else?" Good question, and I guess now is the time to share my thoughts and interpretations on one of them.
First of all, Zelda is not the name of the boy hero in the series (a common misconception). It is the name of the princess that said hero is called upon to rescue. His name is Link, fyi. Why is Zelda so important? Well, it actually all comes down to the most important element in the story - the triforce.
The triforce is what you might consider a relic left by the goddesses Din, Nayru and Farore. The legend goes that after they created the world, they returned to the sacred realm and left the triforce as a symbol of their power and as a gateway to the sacred realm. It was said that if a person accessed the triforce and touched it, the triforce would bestow great power and grant the wishes of that person. If someone with good intentions accessed it, the land of Hyrule would be blessed with peace and prosperity. You could guess what would happen if an evil person touched it.
And so it went that an evil man named Ganondorf snuck his way into the sacred realm, and when he touched it the triforce split into three pieces - power, wisdom and courage. He was given power, but wisdom and courage were granted to two other worthy individuals. Zelda was given wisdom and Link was given courage. Outraged, Ganondorf captured Zelda and sought after Link so that he could have all three pieces and cover the land in darkness. Link's task was to restore peace where Ganondorf had placed monsters and curses throughout the land. He was to grow in strength so that he could eventually confront and destroy Ganondorf and save the princess.
There you have it, the Legend of Zelda in the smallest nutshell I could manage. Now for a glimpse into why this isn't just some cheesy story for kids.
I bet you didn't think there were any similarities between Link and Bond, but there are. First, Link is somewhat of a lady killer. Of course there's Zelda, but in every game I have played there are a number of girls vying for Link's attention. It is important to note that Link is a virtuous hero and would never go sleeping around. All the same, it seems that wherever he turns, he has some girl impressed by his swagger. It makes sense, because after all he has the triforce of courage. Women want someone who isn't afraid and who they can count on for protection. He is trustworthy, selfless, dependable and kind, all things that make women fall in love with him.
With Link, it's all about getting the right gadgets. The difference is that instead of having someone like Q make them and offer them before his mission begins, Link has to find them as he goes along his quest. The gadgets/weapons are always significant and Link could never defeat Ganondorf without them just as Bond always ends up having to use all of his gadgets by the end of the movie in order to get to the bad guy.
Bond is easily recognizable in his suits/tuxedos holding a gun of some kind and Link is instantly recognizable in his green tunic holding the Master Sword. Sure there have been times when Link is seen without his signature getup, just as Bond isn't always wearing a tux, but it always makes an appearance.
Many people are confused by the chronology of the Zelda series and indeed it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. There are like 5 different Links with different backgrounds depending on which game you are playing. Similarly, Bond movies jump all over the place and there are a bunch of different Bonds.
Oh, and Link can take on an innumerable number of baddies all at once because he's just that cool.
Of course, this merely scratches the surface of why I find the Legend of Zelda so fascinating, but that will have to be discussed in future posts.
First of all, Zelda is not the name of the boy hero in the series (a common misconception). It is the name of the princess that said hero is called upon to rescue. His name is Link, fyi. Why is Zelda so important? Well, it actually all comes down to the most important element in the story - the triforce.
The triforce is what you might consider a relic left by the goddesses Din, Nayru and Farore. The legend goes that after they created the world, they returned to the sacred realm and left the triforce as a symbol of their power and as a gateway to the sacred realm. It was said that if a person accessed the triforce and touched it, the triforce would bestow great power and grant the wishes of that person. If someone with good intentions accessed it, the land of Hyrule would be blessed with peace and prosperity. You could guess what would happen if an evil person touched it.
And so it went that an evil man named Ganondorf snuck his way into the sacred realm, and when he touched it the triforce split into three pieces - power, wisdom and courage. He was given power, but wisdom and courage were granted to two other worthy individuals. Zelda was given wisdom and Link was given courage. Outraged, Ganondorf captured Zelda and sought after Link so that he could have all three pieces and cover the land in darkness. Link's task was to restore peace where Ganondorf had placed monsters and curses throughout the land. He was to grow in strength so that he could eventually confront and destroy Ganondorf and save the princess.
There you have it, the Legend of Zelda in the smallest nutshell I could manage. Now for a glimpse into why this isn't just some cheesy story for kids.
I bet you didn't think there were any similarities between Link and Bond, but there are. First, Link is somewhat of a lady killer. Of course there's Zelda, but in every game I have played there are a number of girls vying for Link's attention. It is important to note that Link is a virtuous hero and would never go sleeping around. All the same, it seems that wherever he turns, he has some girl impressed by his swagger. It makes sense, because after all he has the triforce of courage. Women want someone who isn't afraid and who they can count on for protection. He is trustworthy, selfless, dependable and kind, all things that make women fall in love with him.
With Link, it's all about getting the right gadgets. The difference is that instead of having someone like Q make them and offer them before his mission begins, Link has to find them as he goes along his quest. The gadgets/weapons are always significant and Link could never defeat Ganondorf without them just as Bond always ends up having to use all of his gadgets by the end of the movie in order to get to the bad guy.
Bond is easily recognizable in his suits/tuxedos holding a gun of some kind and Link is instantly recognizable in his green tunic holding the Master Sword. Sure there have been times when Link is seen without his signature getup, just as Bond isn't always wearing a tux, but it always makes an appearance.
Many people are confused by the chronology of the Zelda series and indeed it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. There are like 5 different Links with different backgrounds depending on which game you are playing. Similarly, Bond movies jump all over the place and there are a bunch of different Bonds.
Oh, and Link can take on an innumerable number of baddies all at once because he's just that cool.
Of course, this merely scratches the surface of why I find the Legend of Zelda so fascinating, but that will have to be discussed in future posts.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Maybe
Maybe... What a wonderfully easy word. Utilizing that word provides no obligation thereby avoid giving offense, right? I guess that depends on who you talk to, but I submit that maybe = "I'm too scared to say no".
You may have noticed that a number of people don't use this word correctly. Merriam-Webster's Learner Dictionary has this to say about the word maybe: "It is used when you are talking about an action that has a chance of happening in the future." Imagine that. How often do you hear someone use this word who actually thought there was a chance of something happening in the future? Not very often.
Take facebook for instance. Why is there a "maybe" option when you are invited to an event or party when it usually means those people won't be there. I don't want it to sound like I think this party looks lame or that I don't like the person inviting me, so I click maybe. The fact is I think the party doesn't appeal to me or I feel like I don't know the person well enough to want to come. Personally, I think they should create a thumbs up-thumbs down system similar to Pandora. If you give an invite a thumbs down, there would appear a bubble that says "Thank you. We will no longer bother you with parties/events of this kind in the future. Would you like to block all invites from this friend?" Wouldn't that be nice.
Here's one of my favorite things people say:
"Are you coming tomorrow night?"
"Maybe. Who will be there?"
Am I not good enough for you? I guess that means we're not really friends. Why do people ask this all the time? Frankly, it fascinates me. The best is when people say this even when they have nothing else/better planned. Either they don't think hanging out with me is all that alluring or they are looking for someone special they want to hang out with. Face it. In a group of friends there is usually at least one who has more than platonic interest in another friend. If that special someone is not there, the interested party tries to figure out a way to hang out with him/her instead of hanging out with you. Hence, why "maybe" is such a good word. I would hang out with you if so-and-so were there too.
I'm definitely guilty of playing the maybe game. So if ever you ask me to do something and I say "maybe", don't count on me at all, and I expect about the same from you. There might be a chance, but it's a 0.83% chance. Maybe if my future wife was going to be there...
You may have noticed that a number of people don't use this word correctly. Merriam-Webster's Learner Dictionary has this to say about the word maybe: "It is used when you are talking about an action that has a chance of happening in the future." Imagine that. How often do you hear someone use this word who actually thought there was a chance of something happening in the future? Not very often.
Take facebook for instance. Why is there a "maybe" option when you are invited to an event or party when it usually means those people won't be there. I don't want it to sound like I think this party looks lame or that I don't like the person inviting me, so I click maybe. The fact is I think the party doesn't appeal to me or I feel like I don't know the person well enough to want to come. Personally, I think they should create a thumbs up-thumbs down system similar to Pandora. If you give an invite a thumbs down, there would appear a bubble that says "Thank you. We will no longer bother you with parties/events of this kind in the future. Would you like to block all invites from this friend?" Wouldn't that be nice.
Here's one of my favorite things people say:
"Are you coming tomorrow night?"
"Maybe. Who will be there?"
Am I not good enough for you? I guess that means we're not really friends. Why do people ask this all the time? Frankly, it fascinates me. The best is when people say this even when they have nothing else/better planned. Either they don't think hanging out with me is all that alluring or they are looking for someone special they want to hang out with. Face it. In a group of friends there is usually at least one who has more than platonic interest in another friend. If that special someone is not there, the interested party tries to figure out a way to hang out with him/her instead of hanging out with you. Hence, why "maybe" is such a good word. I would hang out with you if so-and-so were there too.
I'm definitely guilty of playing the maybe game. So if ever you ask me to do something and I say "maybe", don't count on me at all, and I expect about the same from you. There might be a chance, but it's a 0.83% chance. Maybe if my future wife was going to be there...
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Concluding thoughts on Persuasion
I just finished the book Persuasion by Jane Austen. Yes, it took me forever to finish it, and no it wasn't because I didn't like it. I got a little distracted by a series of epic books that I will probably write about in the future. I wanted to give my opinions on this book's conclusion.
I have enjoyed this story since I watched one of the movie versions some time ago. It fascinates me that the only reason why there is a story is because two people couldn't talk to each other. It's full of awkward moments that could have been avoided had a conversation taken place. The ironic thing is that the book often comments on the value of meaningful conversation. The hard part was that such a conversation required a lot of humility and courage. The reader continues with anticipation wondering how and when the two heartbroken love birds would talk about their feelings.
Eventually, Captain Wentworth writes his heartfelt letter.
Though I think the story has a lot to offer, I must honestly admit that I am somewhat disappointed by the ending. As I said, I waited with anticipation for them to have a difficult conversation. I wondered who would be the one to initiate it and how the awkwardness would play out. Unfortunately, instead of Wentworth taking Anne aside to confess his unchanged feelings for her, he writes a letter. True, many a woman say the letter is beautiful and so romantic, but I don't think it was enough.
For all those ladies out there, put yourself in Anne's shoes. Imagine being in a wonderful relationship that is on the cusp of marriage, but you eventually end it because someone you hold in high regard persuades you to do so. Eight years later, you regret your decision and when you see him again, you find that your feelings for him have not changed. But, you broke his heart and now he avoids you when he can. Picture him eventually letting go of his pride and wanting to confess he still longs to marry you. What would you think if you got an email from him in which he writes that he has been a fool and wants to be with you. Lovely and romantic though the message may be, I can't help but think that most ladies would be a little disappointed that he couldn't muster the courage to talk face to face. The man is practically asking you to marry him, and he does it through an email? Come on, that's kind of lame.
Also, it wasn't like the ball was in Wentworth's court. She had just as much responsibility to fix their relationship. She broke it off for crying out loud, so if anything, the ball was in her court. After she got the letter, she naturally kind of freaked out and didn't know what to do with herself. Still, she didn't try to find him or anything, and instead was escorted home. What was she planning on doing, think about it for a while?
Now I'm not saying that the book is all that bad because it eventually describes how Wentworth met up with her and they talked about everything. He explained why he acted the way he had and she told him that she was sorry that she was so prideful. It all worked out in the end, which I guess is all that matters. Maybe this book teaches that, in real life, relationships aren't perfect because people aren't perfect. In a perfect world, there wouldn't have been a story because they would have talked the moment they met up again. Maybe that's why I like the story.
I have enjoyed this story since I watched one of the movie versions some time ago. It fascinates me that the only reason why there is a story is because two people couldn't talk to each other. It's full of awkward moments that could have been avoided had a conversation taken place. The ironic thing is that the book often comments on the value of meaningful conversation. The hard part was that such a conversation required a lot of humility and courage. The reader continues with anticipation wondering how and when the two heartbroken love birds would talk about their feelings.
Eventually, Captain Wentworth writes his heartfelt letter.
Though I think the story has a lot to offer, I must honestly admit that I am somewhat disappointed by the ending. As I said, I waited with anticipation for them to have a difficult conversation. I wondered who would be the one to initiate it and how the awkwardness would play out. Unfortunately, instead of Wentworth taking Anne aside to confess his unchanged feelings for her, he writes a letter. True, many a woman say the letter is beautiful and so romantic, but I don't think it was enough.
For all those ladies out there, put yourself in Anne's shoes. Imagine being in a wonderful relationship that is on the cusp of marriage, but you eventually end it because someone you hold in high regard persuades you to do so. Eight years later, you regret your decision and when you see him again, you find that your feelings for him have not changed. But, you broke his heart and now he avoids you when he can. Picture him eventually letting go of his pride and wanting to confess he still longs to marry you. What would you think if you got an email from him in which he writes that he has been a fool and wants to be with you. Lovely and romantic though the message may be, I can't help but think that most ladies would be a little disappointed that he couldn't muster the courage to talk face to face. The man is practically asking you to marry him, and he does it through an email? Come on, that's kind of lame.
Also, it wasn't like the ball was in Wentworth's court. She had just as much responsibility to fix their relationship. She broke it off for crying out loud, so if anything, the ball was in her court. After she got the letter, she naturally kind of freaked out and didn't know what to do with herself. Still, she didn't try to find him or anything, and instead was escorted home. What was she planning on doing, think about it for a while?
Now I'm not saying that the book is all that bad because it eventually describes how Wentworth met up with her and they talked about everything. He explained why he acted the way he had and she told him that she was sorry that she was so prideful. It all worked out in the end, which I guess is all that matters. Maybe this book teaches that, in real life, relationships aren't perfect because people aren't perfect. In a perfect world, there wouldn't have been a story because they would have talked the moment they met up again. Maybe that's why I like the story.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Batman vs. Superman
A lot of people really like Batman.
Of course it makes sense when you think about the recent success of the new Batman movies as compared to the total flop that Superman Returns was. People can connect with Batman because, besides the fact that he's a billionaire, he is a totally normal guy without any super powers. He wasn't bit by some radioactive spider, nor does he come from another planet. He is simply portrayed as a man who is fed up with the degradation in his beloved city and so decides to use the talents and resources he has to fight it. The fact that he does such a good job considering how human he is gives him a lot of credit.
It's easy to empathize with Batman as he lives a lonely life with only his butler knowing who he really is. Sure he has friends both as Bruce Wayne and as Batman, but there is no one else who understands him as a whole person. Batman's closest acquaintance - Commissioner Gordon - doesn't even know very much about him. Many likewise feel that there is more to them than what their friends and acquaintances observe from the outside. A lot of single men and women, like Batman, are also lonely because they don't have someone to share their lives with and who can understand all their intricacies. Additionally, some like to think that there lingers a hero-in-waiting part of them deep inside just as Batman had it in him all along to rise above his socially elite status to become the selfless hero that Gotham needed.
Batman's weaknesses are pretty much the normal, everyday pressure points that people have. He is a typical man who can get distracted at times, isn't always the smartest, nor the strongest but somehow finds a way to get the job done. People see the same flaws in themselves and therefore look up to Batman and how he overcomes his challenges.
You see, an important difference between Batman and Superman is that essentially Superman is an alien and is therefore hard to connect with. He may look like a normal guy, but the man can't get hurt by the normal things. Bullets bounce off of his bare chest for crying out loud. He is so good that he only has two weaknesses - Lois Lane and kryptonite. With these two issues out of the picture, Superman would be absolutely perfect. Those who choose Batman over Superman often site this as one of their main arguments. They reason that Superman is too fictional and just plain boring because he seems so perfect.
Now let me explain a little why I have been and will be a loyal member of the Superman camp.
Superman is the most selfless superhero out there. He comes from a planet that was destroyed and he never knew his parents. He could have decided to be bitter and lived his life taking advantage of everybody around him because of his powers, but chose instead to use those powers to help these strangers. Batman fights for his beloved city, while Superman protects a planet that is not his own.
Superman is a symbol of freedom and everything good. Whenever you see that iconic "S" symbol, you may get a sense of patriotism and generally good feelings (unless you're a hater of course). I believe that's because Superman fights for the same ideals that our founding fathers had. He fights for those who are too weak to help themselves and he fights for the freedom to live in peace. Of course, most super heroes have similar ideals, but Superman has always been the iconic symbol.
Superman has various references to Christ in his story. I'm not being sacrilegious or anything, but I think the symbols are beautiful. He was sent to earth as an only son from his father as a gift to humankind, and his powers are renewed from the light of the sun as Christ is the light of the world.
Superman doesn't decide to be a vigilante in order to help the world. He doesn't need to make himself the scape goat for the world's problems while Batman purposefully makes the decision to become Gotham's Dark Knight. Superman finds a way to be a symbol of good and hope while still being the hero the world needs.
Of course it makes sense when you think about the recent success of the new Batman movies as compared to the total flop that Superman Returns was. People can connect with Batman because, besides the fact that he's a billionaire, he is a totally normal guy without any super powers. He wasn't bit by some radioactive spider, nor does he come from another planet. He is simply portrayed as a man who is fed up with the degradation in his beloved city and so decides to use the talents and resources he has to fight it. The fact that he does such a good job considering how human he is gives him a lot of credit.
It's easy to empathize with Batman as he lives a lonely life with only his butler knowing who he really is. Sure he has friends both as Bruce Wayne and as Batman, but there is no one else who understands him as a whole person. Batman's closest acquaintance - Commissioner Gordon - doesn't even know very much about him. Many likewise feel that there is more to them than what their friends and acquaintances observe from the outside. A lot of single men and women, like Batman, are also lonely because they don't have someone to share their lives with and who can understand all their intricacies. Additionally, some like to think that there lingers a hero-in-waiting part of them deep inside just as Batman had it in him all along to rise above his socially elite status to become the selfless hero that Gotham needed.
Batman's weaknesses are pretty much the normal, everyday pressure points that people have. He is a typical man who can get distracted at times, isn't always the smartest, nor the strongest but somehow finds a way to get the job done. People see the same flaws in themselves and therefore look up to Batman and how he overcomes his challenges.
You see, an important difference between Batman and Superman is that essentially Superman is an alien and is therefore hard to connect with. He may look like a normal guy, but the man can't get hurt by the normal things. Bullets bounce off of his bare chest for crying out loud. He is so good that he only has two weaknesses - Lois Lane and kryptonite. With these two issues out of the picture, Superman would be absolutely perfect. Those who choose Batman over Superman often site this as one of their main arguments. They reason that Superman is too fictional and just plain boring because he seems so perfect.
Now let me explain a little why I have been and will be a loyal member of the Superman camp.
Superman is the most selfless superhero out there. He comes from a planet that was destroyed and he never knew his parents. He could have decided to be bitter and lived his life taking advantage of everybody around him because of his powers, but chose instead to use those powers to help these strangers. Batman fights for his beloved city, while Superman protects a planet that is not his own.
Superman is a symbol of freedom and everything good. Whenever you see that iconic "S" symbol, you may get a sense of patriotism and generally good feelings (unless you're a hater of course). I believe that's because Superman fights for the same ideals that our founding fathers had. He fights for those who are too weak to help themselves and he fights for the freedom to live in peace. Of course, most super heroes have similar ideals, but Superman has always been the iconic symbol.
Superman has various references to Christ in his story. I'm not being sacrilegious or anything, but I think the symbols are beautiful. He was sent to earth as an only son from his father as a gift to humankind, and his powers are renewed from the light of the sun as Christ is the light of the world.
Superman doesn't decide to be a vigilante in order to help the world. He doesn't need to make himself the scape goat for the world's problems while Batman purposefully makes the decision to become Gotham's Dark Knight. Superman finds a way to be a symbol of good and hope while still being the hero the world needs.
Friday, June 10, 2011
The Ravenous Wolf
Hunger is a serious issue. I believe I don't and probably can't understand how blessed I am to have food readily available to me any time of the day. I do understand that countless people go days (we're not talking hours, or maybe 1 day) at a time without getting something to eat and that blows my mind. I wonder how they do it.
But, this post isn't about starving kids in Africa. It's about the wolves among us who make their appearance at restaurants and other places where one can get food. These people come in all shapes and sizes. They can make their appearances finely dressed or look like they just rolled out of bed. They often seem like average, ordinary people - people you could see yourself hanging out with. That is, until their fangs come out when they don't get what they want.
I'm talking about the kinds of people who readily lose their temper and congenial behavior because they are hungry and something doesn't go their way. It could be because their order got messed up. It could be that the food wasn't as good as they had hoped. Or it could be because they were wanting to use their Subway card at the CougarEat Subway only to be told that this particular Subway doesn't accept those cards for some reason (obviously a very hypothetical example).
This particular person seemed nice enough and very familiar with Subway while she was making her order. She wasn't even overly particular with her order or anything. But, when she was told that those cards have written on the back that Subway reserves the right to choose which stores accept or decline Subway cards. She got very upset and obnoxious with the staff, then stormed off as soon as her food was paid for.
Why do people have to lose their cool in situations like this? It wasn't like she didn't get her food. It wasn't like her food randomly cost more than it should. It wasn't like her food was irreparably ruined. It was just because she couldn't get the points on her card. The only issue here was a simple misunderstanding. The rules were nicely and effectively communicated, but for some reason it wasn't enough.
I've worked in a number of restaurants and have dealt with the ravenous wolf and let me tell you, it can get quite ridiculous. I've hung out with friends who have turned into the wolf and have gone on dates with girls who have flashed their canines. I typically slowly stop hanging out with those friends and certainly make that the last date. I believe this kind of behavior is only acceptable if someone has deliberately been wronged or if we're talking about a toddler. Call me naive, but I believe that people generally don't deliberately try to hurt others. If you're still acting like a toddler, then there are some serious issues that need to be worked on. Nobody likes to see the ravenous wolf.
But, this post isn't about starving kids in Africa. It's about the wolves among us who make their appearance at restaurants and other places where one can get food. These people come in all shapes and sizes. They can make their appearances finely dressed or look like they just rolled out of bed. They often seem like average, ordinary people - people you could see yourself hanging out with. That is, until their fangs come out when they don't get what they want.
I'm talking about the kinds of people who readily lose their temper and congenial behavior because they are hungry and something doesn't go their way. It could be because their order got messed up. It could be that the food wasn't as good as they had hoped. Or it could be because they were wanting to use their Subway card at the CougarEat Subway only to be told that this particular Subway doesn't accept those cards for some reason (obviously a very hypothetical example).
This particular person seemed nice enough and very familiar with Subway while she was making her order. She wasn't even overly particular with her order or anything. But, when she was told that those cards have written on the back that Subway reserves the right to choose which stores accept or decline Subway cards. She got very upset and obnoxious with the staff, then stormed off as soon as her food was paid for.
Why do people have to lose their cool in situations like this? It wasn't like she didn't get her food. It wasn't like her food randomly cost more than it should. It wasn't like her food was irreparably ruined. It was just because she couldn't get the points on her card. The only issue here was a simple misunderstanding. The rules were nicely and effectively communicated, but for some reason it wasn't enough.
I've worked in a number of restaurants and have dealt with the ravenous wolf and let me tell you, it can get quite ridiculous. I've hung out with friends who have turned into the wolf and have gone on dates with girls who have flashed their canines. I typically slowly stop hanging out with those friends and certainly make that the last date. I believe this kind of behavior is only acceptable if someone has deliberately been wronged or if we're talking about a toddler. Call me naive, but I believe that people generally don't deliberately try to hurt others. If you're still acting like a toddler, then there are some serious issues that need to be worked on. Nobody likes to see the ravenous wolf.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
The Early-Morning Bond
Have you ever done something fairly consistently with someone or a group early in the morning? Then you'll understand what I mean when I talk about the early-morning bond. It's a phenomenon I have noticed over the years from doing early-morning soccer workouts in high school to waking up early almost every day during college. There's a special, almost inexplicable camaraderie among those who are either forced to or who force themselves to wake up at a ridiculous hour to do something hard.
Those of us who used to do workouts or practices in high school have experienced the strong bonds that form from waking up early to run a bajillion stairs or laps around the field. When the season begins, not only are the athletes physically fit and ready to compete but, maybe even more importantly, they have a connection with each other that has grown to make them a real team. I experienced this connection as I played on two different soccer teams because I moved to a another high school during my sophomore year. One team I played for did these early workouts while the other never did, and I can say that there definitely was a difference. It wasn't like we weren't close as a team without doing the early workouts, but it just wasn't the same. It may not have been something you could see, but it was for sure something you could feel on and off the field. We did similar workouts, but doing them in before the sun rises somehow makes all the difference. I believe there must be an element of added respect for those who wake up early with you because the team that did the early workouts didn't really have anyone that they looked down on. As far as I can remember, there wasn't any one that was particularly picked on or disrespected by the majority of the team. Neither the average player nor star disrespected the bench warmer. We also respected the coaches who would wake up early with us more than the others. Of course, we appreciated and respected our head coach, but we didn't as much as we could have. There was an assistant coach who would run the workouts and all of the guys I played with would tell you that they had a deeper love for this assistant.
I go to the gym pretty consistently in the mornings and love it when I see the same people all the time. Over the past couple of years I have gone with some friends and the bond we created in the mornings is stronger than a lot of my other friendships. Though we don't hang out very often anymore, I feel a really deep friendship with those guys. There's the bond even with the people I see at the gym that I don't even know. Whenever I run across someone on campus that I normally see at the gym we acknowledge each other like we know each other when we never have even been introduced.
I used to go to the temple early on Saturday mornings and experienced this bond with a complete stranger. There was a guy who would go at the same time every week as I did. I didn't know who he was and never even talked to him, but I would see him every week. Then I ran into him on campus talking with some of my friends and we were finally introduced. This happened years ago, but I ran into this guy (yeah I only met him once and completely forgot his name) the other day and it was like meeting an old, close friend.
From these experiences, I have decided that if I want to really form a strong friendship with someone, one of the best ways to do that is through doing something hard together early in the morning. If it can form strong bonds with complete strangers, it for sure can strengthen already established bonds with someone.
I'm sure this blog post doesn't do a very good job at describing what I'm talking about, but those of you who have experienced it know exactly what I'm talking about.
Those of us who used to do workouts or practices in high school have experienced the strong bonds that form from waking up early to run a bajillion stairs or laps around the field. When the season begins, not only are the athletes physically fit and ready to compete but, maybe even more importantly, they have a connection with each other that has grown to make them a real team. I experienced this connection as I played on two different soccer teams because I moved to a another high school during my sophomore year. One team I played for did these early workouts while the other never did, and I can say that there definitely was a difference. It wasn't like we weren't close as a team without doing the early workouts, but it just wasn't the same. It may not have been something you could see, but it was for sure something you could feel on and off the field. We did similar workouts, but doing them in before the sun rises somehow makes all the difference. I believe there must be an element of added respect for those who wake up early with you because the team that did the early workouts didn't really have anyone that they looked down on. As far as I can remember, there wasn't any one that was particularly picked on or disrespected by the majority of the team. Neither the average player nor star disrespected the bench warmer. We also respected the coaches who would wake up early with us more than the others. Of course, we appreciated and respected our head coach, but we didn't as much as we could have. There was an assistant coach who would run the workouts and all of the guys I played with would tell you that they had a deeper love for this assistant.
I go to the gym pretty consistently in the mornings and love it when I see the same people all the time. Over the past couple of years I have gone with some friends and the bond we created in the mornings is stronger than a lot of my other friendships. Though we don't hang out very often anymore, I feel a really deep friendship with those guys. There's the bond even with the people I see at the gym that I don't even know. Whenever I run across someone on campus that I normally see at the gym we acknowledge each other like we know each other when we never have even been introduced.
I used to go to the temple early on Saturday mornings and experienced this bond with a complete stranger. There was a guy who would go at the same time every week as I did. I didn't know who he was and never even talked to him, but I would see him every week. Then I ran into him on campus talking with some of my friends and we were finally introduced. This happened years ago, but I ran into this guy (yeah I only met him once and completely forgot his name) the other day and it was like meeting an old, close friend.
From these experiences, I have decided that if I want to really form a strong friendship with someone, one of the best ways to do that is through doing something hard together early in the morning. If it can form strong bonds with complete strangers, it for sure can strengthen already established bonds with someone.
I'm sure this blog post doesn't do a very good job at describing what I'm talking about, but those of you who have experienced it know exactly what I'm talking about.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Not-so-hidden Meanings
"Can I help you?"
What does this phrase mean? Oh sure, on the surface it sounds like the person saying it cares enough to go out of the way to help. The thing is that people don't ask this question that way. Nine out of ten times, this question should actually be phrased, "Who the heck are you and what are you doing?" You see it all the time, yet why do people continue to try to hide it? Most of the time, people know exactly the real meaning behind it, yet for some reason, we think that they are oblivious to it. Personally, I would rather someone be straightforward. Don't try to make yourself seem cordial and selfless with me, when in reality you can't wait to kick me out the door.
Here's another interesting phrase:
"I hope you're happy."
No you don't. You would like to convince yourself of this, but you don't feel it. When is this phrase ever used besides with resentment and bitterness? I think I have yet to find such an instance.
How about this one that unfortunately I have used on occasion:
"I was totally going to call you."
Let's be honest, no I wasn't. Sure the thought crossed my mind, but it had crossed my mind a number of times before without me ever doing anything about it. For some reason or other, I had decided it wasn't worth making that phone call. Of course, there are times when this statement is true, but usually it's a cover up for "I thought about calling you but I was either too proud to follow through with it or didn't want to give you the impression that I was interested." I didn't call because I was too scared or didn't want you thinking I would call you all the time.
Then there is one of my personal favorites. I hear this one all the time on campus when old friends run into each other:
"We need to do something sometime."
Sure, you would like to do something with me sometime, but it's obviously not high on your priority list or we would have done something already. I'm fine with friends moving on to different stages of life. I'm alright with knowing that I'm probably only going to be a fond memory or an afterthought, but I get kind of annoyed when you say this to me knowing that we'll most likely keep living separate and distinct lives. If only we could just tell each other, "We had some great times, but now we have different friends and different lives. I would love to relive some of those moments, but sadly we can't and now we must move on." Or a simple "I miss hanging out" would suffice.
If only it were okay to tell people how we really feel, what we really think. I think I need to move to Spain where I could learn to say exactly what I'm thinking.
What does this phrase mean? Oh sure, on the surface it sounds like the person saying it cares enough to go out of the way to help. The thing is that people don't ask this question that way. Nine out of ten times, this question should actually be phrased, "Who the heck are you and what are you doing?" You see it all the time, yet why do people continue to try to hide it? Most of the time, people know exactly the real meaning behind it, yet for some reason, we think that they are oblivious to it. Personally, I would rather someone be straightforward. Don't try to make yourself seem cordial and selfless with me, when in reality you can't wait to kick me out the door.
Here's another interesting phrase:
"I hope you're happy."
No you don't. You would like to convince yourself of this, but you don't feel it. When is this phrase ever used besides with resentment and bitterness? I think I have yet to find such an instance.
How about this one that unfortunately I have used on occasion:
"I was totally going to call you."
Let's be honest, no I wasn't. Sure the thought crossed my mind, but it had crossed my mind a number of times before without me ever doing anything about it. For some reason or other, I had decided it wasn't worth making that phone call. Of course, there are times when this statement is true, but usually it's a cover up for "I thought about calling you but I was either too proud to follow through with it or didn't want to give you the impression that I was interested." I didn't call because I was too scared or didn't want you thinking I would call you all the time.
Then there is one of my personal favorites. I hear this one all the time on campus when old friends run into each other:
"We need to do something sometime."
Sure, you would like to do something with me sometime, but it's obviously not high on your priority list or we would have done something already. I'm fine with friends moving on to different stages of life. I'm alright with knowing that I'm probably only going to be a fond memory or an afterthought, but I get kind of annoyed when you say this to me knowing that we'll most likely keep living separate and distinct lives. If only we could just tell each other, "We had some great times, but now we have different friends and different lives. I would love to relive some of those moments, but sadly we can't and now we must move on." Or a simple "I miss hanging out" would suffice.
If only it were okay to tell people how we really feel, what we really think. I think I need to move to Spain where I could learn to say exactly what I'm thinking.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Persuasion
I started reading the book Persuasion the other day. Yes, it is a Jane Austen book, and no, I'm not reading it to impress a girl or because I was forced to in any way. Call me what you will, but I enjoy a little Jane Austen for a few reasons. I like trying to figure out and understand people. Since relationships are a big part of human behavior, I like reading books and watching movies that have various perspectives on relationships.
I particularly like this story for its characters and for its premise. What I find most fascinating about it is the fact that the story is structured around a very awkward set of circumstances that was only awkward and heartbreaking because of a lack of communication. All the two main characters needed to do was have a conversation about past decisions, regrets and a longing for a future. Neither of them could tell the other that they had not given up hope in the other and that they still cared for one another. A rather simple conversation that could have relieved a lot of pain. I like it because I see it in so many people today. People hurt because of a simple lack of communication. Of course, these people tend to avoid having that conversation because it's hard to do. What they don't realize is the fact that maybe at first such conversations are difficult and awkward, but they typically relieve a great deal of future awkwardness.
Anyway, there was one line I read that I continue to think about and wonder. It reads:
"A few months had seen the beginning and the end of their acquaintance; but, not with a few months ended Anne's share of suffering from it."
I find it remarkable that getting emotionally involved with someone can have such powerful and lasting effects on a person. Even something as simple as a crush can happen at the spur of the moment, but when the crush spurns you, it usually takes much longer than just a moment to get over it. I wonder how this can happen. What is it about our brains and bodies that makes us want to cling to a relationship, however deep or shallow it may be? Why are we hardwired to have these feelings and emotions so strong that when the relationship doesn't work out, it takes so long to sever and let go of those emotions? I don't have the slightest idea and don't think I'll come up with an answer any time soon.
All I do know is that we are hard-wired to desire to belong to someone. This is true even for those who try to convince themselves that they don't need someone, that they prefer to be alone. I would dare suggest that it is likely that, in the past, they desired to belong to someone so strongly that the heartbreak is still taking its hold. Some might say they prefer to be alone because they think that this innate drive keeps them from being free and in control. After all, how can one be free when one is bound or belongs to another? The beauty of this concept is that somehow, belonging to someone in the end give us more freedom and much more happiness. It frees us from selfishness and insensitivity. It gives us a deeper sense of purpose.
I particularly like this story for its characters and for its premise. What I find most fascinating about it is the fact that the story is structured around a very awkward set of circumstances that was only awkward and heartbreaking because of a lack of communication. All the two main characters needed to do was have a conversation about past decisions, regrets and a longing for a future. Neither of them could tell the other that they had not given up hope in the other and that they still cared for one another. A rather simple conversation that could have relieved a lot of pain. I like it because I see it in so many people today. People hurt because of a simple lack of communication. Of course, these people tend to avoid having that conversation because it's hard to do. What they don't realize is the fact that maybe at first such conversations are difficult and awkward, but they typically relieve a great deal of future awkwardness.
Anyway, there was one line I read that I continue to think about and wonder. It reads:
"A few months had seen the beginning and the end of their acquaintance; but, not with a few months ended Anne's share of suffering from it."
I find it remarkable that getting emotionally involved with someone can have such powerful and lasting effects on a person. Even something as simple as a crush can happen at the spur of the moment, but when the crush spurns you, it usually takes much longer than just a moment to get over it. I wonder how this can happen. What is it about our brains and bodies that makes us want to cling to a relationship, however deep or shallow it may be? Why are we hardwired to have these feelings and emotions so strong that when the relationship doesn't work out, it takes so long to sever and let go of those emotions? I don't have the slightest idea and don't think I'll come up with an answer any time soon.
All I do know is that we are hard-wired to desire to belong to someone. This is true even for those who try to convince themselves that they don't need someone, that they prefer to be alone. I would dare suggest that it is likely that, in the past, they desired to belong to someone so strongly that the heartbreak is still taking its hold. Some might say they prefer to be alone because they think that this innate drive keeps them from being free and in control. After all, how can one be free when one is bound or belongs to another? The beauty of this concept is that somehow, belonging to someone in the end give us more freedom and much more happiness. It frees us from selfishness and insensitivity. It gives us a deeper sense of purpose.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Dinosaurs
What's the first thing that pops into your head when you hear or read this word? Land Before Time? T-Rex? A vast collection of memories from your childhood?
The truth is, I get a sense that in fact a great many people have thoughts of childishness and, well, silliness. How do dinosaurs go from being so exciting and fascinating to just plain childish? Now, you may be saying to yourself, "Hey, I don't think loving dinosaurs is silly. I respect an adult who loves to study them." Consider this:
Imagine working in some office. This an office of a fairly well-to-do business, though no Microsoft by any means. Imagine the kinds of side conversations going on between co-workers. Maybe a couple of guys are talking about skiing over the weekend. Then there might be another group talking about how they just saw a great movie. There could be a woman talking about going on a date with a certain special someone. Imagine someone talking about dinosaurs. The context behind this conversation doesn't matter. It sounds kind of out of place no matter which way you spin it. The only people I can possibly imagine bringing up dinosaurs in an office would be Michael Scott or Dwight. Quirky and nerdy.
Now don't get me wrong, this post is about how unfortunate it is that dinosaur lovers have this stigma. Type in "dinosaurs" in google and see what comes up. The second one listed (only after wikepedia) is called "kidsdinos.com". Why are dinosaurs for kids? This doesn't look like something cute and cudly.
I don't know if it was Barney that started it or if that show was a result of years of unspoken social rules. I see nothing childish in people interested in studying the early inhabitants of this earth. It sounds quite fascinating to me personally. Yet, those who visit dinosaur museums tend to be either kids or scholars. Your run-of-the-mill adult could not show an outward passion for dinosaurs without losing some kind of social status.
I think dinosaurs are great and those adults who embrace their interest and love for dinosaurs should be praised for their lack of conformity. I have a couple of friends who have had dinosaur parties and though probably most of us kind of chuckled at the thought of a dinosaur party, they were well attended and we enjoyed them.
So next time you find yourself snickering at someone mentioning or talking about dinosaurs, think twice before labeling that person as childish. There are plenty of intelligent people who have spent their lives not letting others' opinions deter them from studying and teaching others about these creatures.
The truth is, I get a sense that in fact a great many people have thoughts of childishness and, well, silliness. How do dinosaurs go from being so exciting and fascinating to just plain childish? Now, you may be saying to yourself, "Hey, I don't think loving dinosaurs is silly. I respect an adult who loves to study them." Consider this:
Imagine working in some office. This an office of a fairly well-to-do business, though no Microsoft by any means. Imagine the kinds of side conversations going on between co-workers. Maybe a couple of guys are talking about skiing over the weekend. Then there might be another group talking about how they just saw a great movie. There could be a woman talking about going on a date with a certain special someone. Imagine someone talking about dinosaurs. The context behind this conversation doesn't matter. It sounds kind of out of place no matter which way you spin it. The only people I can possibly imagine bringing up dinosaurs in an office would be Michael Scott or Dwight. Quirky and nerdy.
Now don't get me wrong, this post is about how unfortunate it is that dinosaur lovers have this stigma. Type in "dinosaurs" in google and see what comes up. The second one listed (only after wikepedia) is called "kidsdinos.com". Why are dinosaurs for kids? This doesn't look like something cute and cudly.
 |
| you technically can't even access the website for the video game this picture comes from unless you are 17 or older |
I don't know if it was Barney that started it or if that show was a result of years of unspoken social rules. I see nothing childish in people interested in studying the early inhabitants of this earth. It sounds quite fascinating to me personally. Yet, those who visit dinosaur museums tend to be either kids or scholars. Your run-of-the-mill adult could not show an outward passion for dinosaurs without losing some kind of social status.
I think dinosaurs are great and those adults who embrace their interest and love for dinosaurs should be praised for their lack of conformity. I have a couple of friends who have had dinosaur parties and though probably most of us kind of chuckled at the thought of a dinosaur party, they were well attended and we enjoyed them.
So next time you find yourself snickering at someone mentioning or talking about dinosaurs, think twice before labeling that person as childish. There are plenty of intelligent people who have spent their lives not letting others' opinions deter them from studying and teaching others about these creatures.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Tired of the Love Advice
I read my school's student newspaper and had to say something in reference to one of the articles. This well-intended article included advice from various students on how to handle the upcoming Valentines Day. The only problem is that I believe most often advice of this sort, in general, doesn't work. Here's why.
Typically the person giving the advice thinks he or she has the answer, but the problem about this wonderful phase of life is that there is no formula. The dilemma is that life cannot be solved like a math problem. The thing is, if the answers could be solved by anyone knowing the equations, it would be quite boring.
One reason why I'm not a fan of Valentines Day is because it seems to be the time of year that people become even more eager to give you their advice on love (and believe me, I get plenty of that from day to day anyway). Take the newspaper for instance. Every year newspapers are flooded with articles like the one I read in my school paper. These are the kinds of themes that are always repeated:
Guys are like this. They appreciate this and don't appreciate that.
Girls are like this. They appreciate this and don't appreciate that.
While there may be some commonalities within the sexes, I think it's rather silly to put every guy or girl under the same umbrella. For instance, I often hear something like, "Guys aren't very subtle and aren't very good at picking up on hints." True, typically guys are not quite as good as girls, but that doesn't mean that all men are completely dense about these things. Here was one of my favorites from the article written by a dude: "Girls shouldn't give guys a homemade valentine because we'll just throw it away the next day." Whoever wrote that might not be very sensitive, but I know plenty of guys that are. There are some men who aren't afraid of showing a little sensitivity.
I also know a number of girls who aren't your typical cookie-cutters either. Trying to be all corny and cutsy with them will only make them laugh (and no, that is not an "oh you're so cute" kind of laugh).
There may be some people who really could use Dr. Love's advice because they might be completely clueless about these sorts of things. Personally, I think all it takes is getting to know a person. I believe you'll know what to do when you've spent enough effort trying to figure out what he/she really appreciates.
So, unless I ask for it, I don't want your advice.
Typically the person giving the advice thinks he or she has the answer, but the problem about this wonderful phase of life is that there is no formula. The dilemma is that life cannot be solved like a math problem. The thing is, if the answers could be solved by anyone knowing the equations, it would be quite boring.
One reason why I'm not a fan of Valentines Day is because it seems to be the time of year that people become even more eager to give you their advice on love (and believe me, I get plenty of that from day to day anyway). Take the newspaper for instance. Every year newspapers are flooded with articles like the one I read in my school paper. These are the kinds of themes that are always repeated:
Guys are like this. They appreciate this and don't appreciate that.
Girls are like this. They appreciate this and don't appreciate that.
While there may be some commonalities within the sexes, I think it's rather silly to put every guy or girl under the same umbrella. For instance, I often hear something like, "Guys aren't very subtle and aren't very good at picking up on hints." True, typically guys are not quite as good as girls, but that doesn't mean that all men are completely dense about these things. Here was one of my favorites from the article written by a dude: "Girls shouldn't give guys a homemade valentine because we'll just throw it away the next day." Whoever wrote that might not be very sensitive, but I know plenty of guys that are. There are some men who aren't afraid of showing a little sensitivity.
I also know a number of girls who aren't your typical cookie-cutters either. Trying to be all corny and cutsy with them will only make them laugh (and no, that is not an "oh you're so cute" kind of laugh).
There may be some people who really could use Dr. Love's advice because they might be completely clueless about these sorts of things. Personally, I think all it takes is getting to know a person. I believe you'll know what to do when you've spent enough effort trying to figure out what he/she really appreciates.
So, unless I ask for it, I don't want your advice.
Monday, February 7, 2011
And you thought science was boring...
There once was a man named Ramon y Cajal who studied the brain. He was a rather troubled child and once got in a heap of trouble for blowing up the town gate with a canon he made himself (at age eleven mind you). Besides science he also loved painting.
He painstakingly spent hours staining nerve cells so he could then spend days staring at them under a microscope. As he observed their every detail, he would make drawings of all the cells and nerve connections he saw. We owe a lot of what we know about the microscopic anatomy of the brain because of his efforts.
He also studied how nerve cells develop in a fetus and hypothesized theories we use today. Back when scientific writing was free from its boring, unclear jargon we find in today's journals, he described how nerve cells began and finished their developmental growth into mature circuits.
He wrote about how nerve cells grow out elongated "finger-like" processes moved by some "mysterious forces" that "precede the appearances of these processes". These fingers start in an area, like the future spinal cord, searching for their final destiny in a specific location (another cell in the brain) which was somehow specified even before the birth of this nerve cell. Thus, the cell begins its journey to find its "soul mate" if you will. Cajal wrote that when the cells arrive at their destination, they get to "finally establish those protoplasmic kisses...which seem to constitute the final ecstasy of an epic love story."
Such a simple and elegant story about our beginnings. Science can indeed be beautiful.
He painstakingly spent hours staining nerve cells so he could then spend days staring at them under a microscope. As he observed their every detail, he would make drawings of all the cells and nerve connections he saw. We owe a lot of what we know about the microscopic anatomy of the brain because of his efforts.
 |
| one of Cajal's drawings |
He also studied how nerve cells develop in a fetus and hypothesized theories we use today. Back when scientific writing was free from its boring, unclear jargon we find in today's journals, he described how nerve cells began and finished their developmental growth into mature circuits.
He wrote about how nerve cells grow out elongated "finger-like" processes moved by some "mysterious forces" that "precede the appearances of these processes". These fingers start in an area, like the future spinal cord, searching for their final destiny in a specific location (another cell in the brain) which was somehow specified even before the birth of this nerve cell. Thus, the cell begins its journey to find its "soul mate" if you will. Cajal wrote that when the cells arrive at their destination, they get to "finally establish those protoplasmic kisses...which seem to constitute the final ecstasy of an epic love story."
Such a simple and elegant story about our beginnings. Science can indeed be beautiful.
Monday, January 24, 2011
One Way I've Changed
I don't know how it happened, but for some reason over the past couple years somehow my tastes have changed quite a bit. I used to scoff at really artsy things thinking that people like eccentric art just because some dude (or girl) says it's cool. I didn't like having some rich or famous person tell me what to appreciate.
Now I find myself drawn to various forms of art that I used to think was way too weird or ridiculous. The other day, I further came to this realization of how much I like strange art. Though I haven't really previously viewed food as an art form, I found one man I praise as an artist.
I came across an article in Time magazine about a chef named Grant Achatz and his award-winning restaurant Alinea. This article is one of the few magazine articles I have actually read all the way through (so I recommend checking it out in order to understand a little more about what I'm trying to say here). Achatz's work intrigues me because he pushes the envelope a bit when it comes to your traditional dining experience. Take this dish for example:
Now I find myself drawn to various forms of art that I used to think was way too weird or ridiculous. The other day, I further came to this realization of how much I like strange art. Though I haven't really previously viewed food as an art form, I found one man I praise as an artist.
I came across an article in Time magazine about a chef named Grant Achatz and his award-winning restaurant Alinea. This article is one of the few magazine articles I have actually read all the way through (so I recommend checking it out in order to understand a little more about what I'm trying to say here). Achatz's work intrigues me because he pushes the envelope a bit when it comes to your traditional dining experience. Take this dish for example:
This dish is called Fried Pheasant, Burning Leaves and the caption to this picture reads: "Juxtaposition and aroma are key ingredients at Alinea, where a bite of tempura-dipped pheasant is served on a branch of burning oak leaves to evoke memories of fall." I think this is pure genius and can only imagine how the sight, smell and taste of this dish would be to experience. Needless to say, after reading about the restaurant Alinea, I decided that is one place I am going to visit in the future. I don't care that having that experience costs $195; I'm going to see what such a restaurant is like. Since I'm a poor college student, I don't see myself going anytime soon, but if anyone else wants to accompany me I might consider taking a few more shifts at work and making an awesome road trip out of it.
Here's another great photo of a dish simply called Bacon:
It would almost be a shame to eat something that is so cleverly and beautifully made.
Not only is his work beautiful, but Achatz's story is rather poetic. He is a man who has worked most of his life developing his culinary talents but recently discovered he has tongue cancer. Though he hasn't smoked or exposed his mouth to anything that would normally cause this kind of cancer, he ironically now has to deal with working at his career without one of his most important tools. Thankfully he still has his sense of smell and can use others to taste test.
Thank you Grant and I look forward to seeing your work one of these days.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Why I Hate Texting
Sure, sending a quick text can be very practical and efficient. It's a great way to get a quick message out to somebody instead of having to find a place where you're not bothering other people while you're talking on the phone. In fact I get rather annoyed by people who are at the library having some long conversation about what they plan on doing this weekend. Get off your bum and go outside to have your blasted conversation! Of course I send a number of texts everyday because I heard or saw something hilarious that I want to share with others. When I'm really bored in class the first thing I do is pull out my phone and think of a message to send to my brother or some friend.
However, in the words of the Steward of Gondor, "I know [it's] uses, and they are few."
Call me old fashioned or whatever, but I would much rather hear your voice in person or over the phone. Why is it such a big deal? Here's why.
Real intent and meanings of words are easily misinterpreted in text messages! Think of all the interpretations of the following phrase:
"It would have been nice if you had let me know."
Harmless phrase from someone asking for better communication in the future or the outcry of an upset individual? My friend sent a similar message to a girl who after receiving it thought he was mad at her. On the contrary, he only got mad when she misinterpreted his intent. Did he try to call or talk to her to clear up the problem? Yes, multiple times. Did she fail to call him back or talk to him even when she saw him? Yep. After listening to my friend relate this story, I completely understood that after these events he was not eager to try to continue their relationship.
Here's another one. Think of all the ways you can alter the meaning of this single word: whatever.
This simple word could be said by a jerk who is blowing you off. It could be said by someone who is tired and doesn't really want to talk right now. Maybe it's said by someone who honestly doesn't care what's decided either way and wants to leave it up to the person to whom he/she texted this word. I could think of a myriad of nuances associated with this word.
The thing about texting is that it's difficult, annoying and time-consuming to write very much. Nobody wants to have to explain himself/herself in great detail. Otherwise what's the purpose of texting? Besides, not all of us are English gurus with talents of expression through the written word. But, people tend to analyze every word seeking for possible hidden meanings. This sounds stupid but I've talked to many adults who have become offended or have thought that some guy or girl was showing interest because of a word or two. Who are they to know exactly what the other person meant with a certain word choice?
I hate texting because it gives people an excuse to get out of a potentially awkward or difficult situation. How many people have been asked out on dates or have been dumped over a text message? Unfortunately I hear these kinds of stories all the time. People should suck it up and at least have the decency to make a phone call. Sure it might be difficult. Sure you might not know exactly what to say, but that's life.
So if it takes me a while to answer a text, or if my replies seem really short, don't think it's because I hate you. I just hate texting.
However, in the words of the Steward of Gondor, "I know [it's] uses, and they are few."
Call me old fashioned or whatever, but I would much rather hear your voice in person or over the phone. Why is it such a big deal? Here's why.
Real intent and meanings of words are easily misinterpreted in text messages! Think of all the interpretations of the following phrase:
"It would have been nice if you had let me know."
Harmless phrase from someone asking for better communication in the future or the outcry of an upset individual? My friend sent a similar message to a girl who after receiving it thought he was mad at her. On the contrary, he only got mad when she misinterpreted his intent. Did he try to call or talk to her to clear up the problem? Yes, multiple times. Did she fail to call him back or talk to him even when she saw him? Yep. After listening to my friend relate this story, I completely understood that after these events he was not eager to try to continue their relationship.
Here's another one. Think of all the ways you can alter the meaning of this single word: whatever.
This simple word could be said by a jerk who is blowing you off. It could be said by someone who is tired and doesn't really want to talk right now. Maybe it's said by someone who honestly doesn't care what's decided either way and wants to leave it up to the person to whom he/she texted this word. I could think of a myriad of nuances associated with this word.
The thing about texting is that it's difficult, annoying and time-consuming to write very much. Nobody wants to have to explain himself/herself in great detail. Otherwise what's the purpose of texting? Besides, not all of us are English gurus with talents of expression through the written word. But, people tend to analyze every word seeking for possible hidden meanings. This sounds stupid but I've talked to many adults who have become offended or have thought that some guy or girl was showing interest because of a word or two. Who are they to know exactly what the other person meant with a certain word choice?
I hate texting because it gives people an excuse to get out of a potentially awkward or difficult situation. How many people have been asked out on dates or have been dumped over a text message? Unfortunately I hear these kinds of stories all the time. People should suck it up and at least have the decency to make a phone call. Sure it might be difficult. Sure you might not know exactly what to say, but that's life.
So if it takes me a while to answer a text, or if my replies seem really short, don't think it's because I hate you. I just hate texting.
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